When you make a serious mistake and the other party has a deep prejudice on you, apologizing directly in person will surely be reprimanded by the other party. At this time, the other party will only vent their emotions, and it is difficult to accept an apology, so you'd better first use a third party to convey your apology, let the other party calm down, and then wait for the other party's mood to calm down a little, and then come to apologize in person.
Once, when Su Dongpo visited Wang Anshi, he happened to see that Wang Anshi was not at home, but saw an unfinished poem under his desk and inkstone: "last night, the west wind passed through the garden, blowing down yellow flowers and gold all over the ground." Su Dongpo thought: chrysanthemum has the bone of proud frost, how can petals fall everywhere? What a mistake Wang Gong made! Therefore, Su Shi continued his poem with a brush: "autumn flowers are not like spring flowers. He said that he would sing carefully with the poet." And then he walked away.
After a while, Su Dongpo went to the back garden to enjoy the chrysanthemums. It was just a few days when the wind was blowing. There were not a single flower on the branches of more than ten chrysanthemums in the garden. All he saw was fallen flowers and covered with gold. Su Dongpo was stunned for a moment. He thought of those two continuation poems and blushed. He wanted to apologize to Wang Anshi in person, but he was worried that he could not explain them clearly. He finally came up with a way to invite Wang Ling, Wang Anshi's closest poetry friend, to his home. Then he told him about the change of verse that day, and then exclaimed:
"So far, I am deeply ashamed and guilty of Wang Anshi. This has taught me too much. Don't rely on your intelligence to ridicule others."
Later, Wang Ling conveyed Su Shi's apology to Wang Anshi. Knowing his good intentions, Wang Anshi eliminated his estrangement from Su Shi.
Use a third party to convey your apology
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