A bowl of water is needed for persuasion

The most important thing in persuasion is to keep a bowl of water level and to be fair.

(1) Get to know the situation

Blind persuasion, can not speak to the point, not only ineffective, and sometimes cause the party's aversion: "do not understand the situation, what nonsense?" It is better to make clear the situation and speak again. If you quarrel with your neighbors and colleagues for complicated reasons, you should find out the situation in detail from the front and side as much as possible, and try to speak to the heart of the parties. To untie the knot, we should see clearly the shape of the knot, remove the knot in the heart, and see through the knot in the heart.

(2) Distinguish between primary and secondary

There are primary and secondary aspects of contradiction, and there are primary and secondary aspects between the two sides in a quarrel. It is easier to settle the dispute if we focus on the party who is fiercely worded and quarrels too much. If we do not divide the primary and secondary, the average use of strength, the effect is certainly not good.

(3) Objective and fair

Persuasion should distinguish right from wrong, be objective and fair, make analysis to the point, criticize reasonably and persuade appropriately. We should not be unprincipled in "making peace with others" and strike fifty big boards regardless of right and wrong. We should seek truth from facts, not only making clear right and wrong, but also uniting comrades.

The reason why the two sides of a conflict argue endlessly is that they have different views on a certain issue, rather than arguing about right and wrong. As a result, they hold their own opinions, praise and criticize each other, and even hurt each other's dignity. As a mediator, in the face of the two sides of the dispute, we can not easily conclude who is right and who is wrong, and we can not make a moral evaluation of which side, which will only aggravate the conflict.

It is better for the mediator to attribute the differences between the two sides to an objective reason, so that both sides do not bear the responsibility for right and wrong. This is equivalent to giving both sides a lower level, so that both sides can feel the psychological balance, so both sides can often calm down and gradually eliminate the conflict.

In fact, it is not particularly difficult to be a good mediator. As long as holding a fair and selfless heart, to achieve "a bowl of water Duanping" plus some language skills.